iphones and Welfare

So many times, I hear these kinds of sentiments.  People are upset when they see a person who is receiving public assistance and is wearing some name brand shoes/clothing and also has a nicer phone than they have.  I'm not a financial person, and I don't think too much about how much money our family pays in taxes.  So, that's probably part of the reason it typically doesn't bother me too much when I see someone on public assistance spending more on something than I personally would.

Another reason it doesn't bother me too much, though, is because I've watched how at least one person on public assistance lives.  This person will get some money from some governmental entity and then will spend way more on something than they can afford, and then, they sacrifice greatly until they get their next check.  They have to scrimp and go without so much that by the time they get their next check, they overspend once again.  It's feast or famine.  They don't seem to know how to live any other way.  It's a pattern that is probably pretty ingrained.  They probably know they can't afford to buy the nice phone or shoes or whatever, but they  do it anyway, even if it means subsisting on Ramen noodles for days.

I sure don't want to switch places.  I have really mixed feelings about what the solution is for people who can't seem to make it without public assistance.  I vacillate wildly between thinking people will never change as long as we keep throwing money their way, but at the same time, people do truly need help, and I'm thankful they are able to get help in our country.  So, I don't think there's a one-size-fits-all-solution, but I will say, I usually don't feel like complaining about this or that item that they have which is better than mine.  The thing people who are on public assistance don't have is any security.  They live from hand-out to hand-out, and what recourse do they have if the government or the non-profit agency decides not to give them money any more?  Not much.  They are at the mercy of everyone else.  They can't take anyone to court.  Truly, none of us has complete security.  Still, when you have a job or know you have the skills/education to get a job, you have quite a bit more stability in your life.  While it's very annoying to me in one sense, it kind of makes sense to me why people on public assistance spend their money right away...they've been doing without for so long that they want to fill up while they can.

The major reason I don't feel really judgmental about the way people on welfare spend their money is because of my lack of discipline in the area of eating.  Just like someone who doesn't have a lot of money to spend, I don't have a lot of calories I can eat per day.  I'm limited.  Even though I know I can't afford to eat much without seeing it on the scale, I still do it.  Then, my weight creeps up, and I have to become really strict and do without for awhile just to keep my weight at 35 pounds over my ideal weight.  I work really hard and then I get 30 pounds over my ideal weight, and I feel so good that I overeat..for awhile.  Feast or famine.  Literally.  How can I judge someone who is not disciplined with money when I'm not disciplined with food?  It's not a perfect analogy, I know, but I do feel like a hypocrite whenever I find myself looking down my nose at someone who is spending money they don't have or spending their money in stupid ways.  I eat calories I can't afford and make stupid food choices almost every day.  I'm not giving up.  And they shouldn't either.  However, I acknowledge that it's damn hard to make good choices even when you know it's worth it.

It seems to me that the people who get the most annoyed with "people on welfare who have iphones" are the people who are very disciplined and work hard in every area of their lives.  People who have always been in control of themselves.  I admire these people, and in a way, I feel like they have a right to judge, but I still don't think it's good for their souls to be angry and unforgiving of the rest of us messed-up slackers.  Instead of being angry and complaining, I would hope they would use their disciplined drive to help find solutions and to pray.

Trying to help someone improve their situation is very complicated, and they personally have to want it, I mean really, really want to change...Just like losing weight requires someone to really, really want to change...but maybe it takes years to get there.  So we have to be patient.